Two Tickets to Paradise



I was hoping that by now we would have moved on from sex by the fireplace season and now be comfortably in sex by the infinity pool season, but unfortunately the weather is conspiring against me. I’ll say this: sunny holidays can’t come soon enough, and I’d love you to get in touch with your ideas.
A romantic holiday is an unbeatable experience. Last year I spent a week in St Tropez with a girl friend and honestly as strange as it sounds, I began harbouring fantasies about how nice it would be to do this type of holiday in a romantic context (not with her, she’s lovely and I apologise for shattering any illusions but I am very straight 😂 and love male company). Whilst we were there I made friends with a very cool couple from Australia, and I thought… these people know a thing or two about life. Whilst you’d imagine St Tropez would be best suited to single people, I actually thought how fun it must be to experience this kind of place with someone you fancy. Whilst I stood on a table, my Louboutins splashed with someone’s rum and coke, surrounded by people who appear to live their whole lives through the lens of an Instagram filter, and I look around and I see the couple at their table, drunk together, enjoying an extremely passionate kiss and I thought – I’d much rather be doing that. I think you know you have good chemistry with someone when you want to share experiences with them. Rather than trying to escape them!
I can’t remember exactly how many countries I’ve travelled to. I think it’s around 40. As a companion, 95% of my travel is with the same people as typically once you have this experience you want to do it again. It’s not (just) because you enjoy the benefit of waking up to my naked backside in the morning – shortly before discovering I’m a morning person – but also because simply sharing a romantic travel experience with someone you fancy is one of the sexiest, fun, memorable experiences you can have. Even when I travel alone (which I do every so often) unexpected things always happen. I don’t really believe in fate, but I do think that you create an environment for special memories when you travel, and so travelling with a special person increases your odds yet again.
I’ve lived alone for quite a few years and I love my own space. I like my own time to think, I need my time in the bathroom to… well… even I’m not quite sure what exactly I’m doing in there for so long 😂 but anyway, I think a lot of people are like me and seek balance when travelling. Yes: Breakfast in bed. Yes: Me forcing you to do a hike with me. Yes: Lunch on a terrace (seafood and champagne for me then pistachio gelato) but also Yes to not needing to be joined at the hip the whole time. I’m a very relaxed person, I like the beach holidays where the most pressing question of the day is am I wearing the gold or the pink bikini, but I also love a city break and I’m a master planner for this type of trip too (if you don’t want to do it). For me the restaurants are important- I always put a bit of time into researching nice places. I love Greece (I’ve been going pretty much my whole life) and there are so many nice little Tavernas and rustic family run places which serve beautiful simple food (and that horrible drink they give you “Ouzo”. Ouzo is like Limoncello – nobody likes the stuff. I’m convinced both are only manufactured purely to create jobs in the factories 😂 Hence they’re always giving it to you for free. You never finish a meal and get offered a free glass of Macallan, do you? 😂 I don’t believe anyone alive has ever (ever!) gone into a bar and asked for a Limoncello). Anyway, how much I love these romantic holidays in the sun. There’s a psychological impact to being away from home – you feel more free to be yourself, to be spontaneous. Where at home you can walk down the same road every day without noticing a thing – on holiday you may stroll down some small alley in Rome, or Barcelona, and notice a tiny church and think to yourself: That’s an interesting building. You may walk inside and find it beautiful. And the same goes for people. You may sit for 15 minutes talking to your waiter about something or another. I don’t want to sound overly profound but there’s no way to say this that isn’t profound: New experiences are the antidote to death.
And the sex! Try balcony sex in London and prepare to make awkward eye contact with the entire HR department of the office opposite 😂 Try sex in what you think is a remote location in the UK and prepare to end up going viral on “TikTok” (difficult to recover from this one). A holiday creates new opportunities for excitement and intimacy. What may start as the innocent application of sun lotion (after all, I can’t do my back myself 😇) can end up leading to a not so innocent rush back to the room. I have a lot of fantasies about this type of thing. Most of my fantasies are so outrageous they’re almost surreal, or they’re about very normal situation but with someone I have a very strong physical connection with. You don’t have to do crazy things all the time, if you’re with someone you really like. This is how I felt when I met that couple in St Tropez. I was a bit jealous to be honest 😂 I don’t know if jealousy is the right word. I just thought… my feet hurt, I’ve been partying until 5am for the last 4 days… it would be nice to have a man around to rub my feet and bring me a fruit plate from the breakfast buffet (amongst other things!) Obviously I’m a romantic person and I have romantic values and outlook. I am the Disney generation after all (real Disney, not this lazy CGI stuff). Late nights, uncomfortable shoes, princess complex… Don’t blame me blame Cinderella 😂Â
Billie x