There is said to be a Chinese curse which roughly (and humorously) translates to “May you live in interesting times.”
The origins of this quote are disputed, but the sentiment is very clear: nomatter where on the planet, or at what point in history, one thing most people have consistently hoped for, is a life of peace and stability. Well, unlike most, I have always lived in interesting times! And the idea of routine life, or predictable week fills me with dread. My “normal” is last minute flights where I end up running to the gate in strappy heels and a cocktail dress, dinners where I deliberately choose something on the menu that I’ve never heard of, waking up at 6am to get to the park for a workout I’ve devised the night before, or collapsing in a heap after a passionate time at a gorgeous hotel. Interesting times for me, are a blessing not a curse. Albeit I could never predict that “interesting times” in this era would translate to face masks, hand sanitizer, and quarantines, the paradox is these things are actually not interesting at all. They’re painfully boring. I love relaxation and peace but I can’t stand monotony. My idea of hell is waking up on a Monday and knowing exactly what I’ll be doing this time next week. My pleasure and passion is to open up my emails and read “Dear Billie, it’s a long shot, but I was wondering if…”.
These last few months have been the longest continuous time I have stayed in the UK without travelling for more than a decade. It’s been tricky – I love the UK but if I go too long without sipping an Aperol spritz on a terrace in the med, I start to get withdrawl symptoms! I have created areas of micro-chaos through really switching up my workout routine, cooking all sorts of things I would otherwise have never attempted, decorating my apartment, and other small things that throw up the little conundrums and unexpected moments that I enjoy so much. Of course, many of my wonderful clients have also broken the monotony with thoughtful emails and kind gifts, it’s been very helpful for someone that craves stimulation like me.
I do love my own company, but as a choice – not something inflicted on me! Of course, things can always have been much worse, but at the same time I don’t like stagnating… I love to improve myself and my life in very measurable ways, and when I think about these last few months… I feel irritated that the friendships and experiences I would otherwise have had in my new home and new area have instead been replaced by queues for the Post Office and frequent hand washing. I’ve always believed in living life fearlessly and without apology, and one pleasant side effect of the pandemic is I think many people are now coming round to my way of thinking! I love doers. I love decisive men who have the perspective to realise that life is short and pleasure is a priority. After all, locked in the house during a pandemic, so many material things are of no use at all! But wonderful memories hold their value. Experiences are the best investment because the feelings and joy and memories from good experiences stay with you forever. Many people don’t realise this and accumilate many high value items but no high value memories. Why have regrets when you can have experiences!
I love contrast and contradiction… my new existence as a domestic goddess/fitness guru is painfully wholesome – yes I love creating recipes, jogging through Regents Park and so on… but I also love sneaking into a hotel dressed like someone’s PA, picking out a sexy lingerie for the evening, flirting outrageously over cocktails, having my panties pulled down without my permission, deep French kissing, etc. Without the excitement and balance of my life as Billie, I’ve had a brief experience of what it must be like I guess… to be a normal girl who’s highlight of the week is watching “Love Island” and having a bubble bath. Urgh!!!! To quote Dorothy Parker – “What fresh hell is this?!”
Thank God it’s nearly over. A catch up and some bubbly are in order.
For the first time in a long time, if I half close my eyes, next week my diary vaguely resembles a normal week. Things I haven’t entered in months like “lunch date” and “hairdresser”, “Paris” and “manicure” have magically appeared, my lovely regular clients are also finally remerging (hello – this has been awful! Let’s make ourselves feel better about it!) It’s almost like spring, a real sense that things can and will only get better (I fully appreciate that due to threats of a second wave/nuclear destruction/race war, or all of the above, this feeling is somewhat naïve, but allow me a moment of delusion, I haven’t had a cocktail in months and it’s starting to get to me). I have no predictions for what will happen… or I do have predictions but they’re likely to be wrong, so my approach is more than ever to enjoy the wonderful summer season and throw myself into exciting and happy moments, whilst we can. Speaking of which, I was invited to a top secret and very fun party on Friday (all details redacted due to Official Secrets Act) and it reminded me that, good company is such a great antidote for almost anything. Something strange also happened, they had a selection of very good rum, and I previously thought I hated rum, but I tasted one named Ron Zacapa 23 (and a few others which I… ahem, can’t remember the names of) and I found it to be very delicious. I normally dont like things of that flavour profile (don’t enjoy neat spirits and gravitate towards sweet things), but this rum was so delicious! Clearly my palate has become so bored over the last few months that it’s decided to like new things!
I have another photo shoot coming up next week (final one!). This one is much sexier than those I’ve done over recent months – the simple reason being photo studios, AirBnBs and hotels have all been closed so it’s been impossible for me to do a sexier shoot, due to not having a location to do one in! Hence I have been shooting fashion, and using the park/nice streets as a location. Feeling somewhat apprehensive at this upcoming shoot as I don’t really think of myself as a consciously sexy person, by which I mean… I’m just me, whatever that is… I am not spending too much time “trying” to be sexy and honestly I just love being a woman so present myself in a feminine way because it’s what I like and how I like to feel. But this shoot will require a lot more sass and a lot more sexiness. I’m looking forward to it – something different and I have a beautiful selection of lingerie, catsuit, leather, heels, lace, stockings… I hope you’ll like it! Also those who contributed something towards the shoot will of course get some exclusive behind the scenes pics xxx
Speaking of pics, I finally got some art prints and photography that I’ve had for a while, framed and ready to hang. I’m waiting on one last piece from an artist friend in New York, and then I will have my own little collection. I love the “salon” style of hanging art which is where different shape and sized pieces of art are hung to fit together like a collage, and I’m hoping to do something similar on my own wall. Feeling somewhat inspired by the party I went to, which was at such a beautiful penthouse with some great art – I love beautiful architecture, big, modern art, modern and mid century furniture, good design. Whether it’s a sofa, a stiletto, or a sportscar, I love beautifully designed things with aesthetic detail and integrity. I always notice a nice doorhandle, or a gentleman’s jacket with a luxurious lining, and when I pick clothes for myself or items for my home, I am always taking into account small details and good quality. I would love to really learn more about art this year, as I get so much pleasure from modern art, but other than the handful or artists I know and love, don’t know much else. In some ways, art is a bit like wine – what’s most important is knowing what you like, but that said, it’s always nice to expose yourself to new things. Actually… that’s very much a motto for life!
Very much looking forward to next week, and can’t wait to meet you! There mere thought of a waiter saying “would you like still or sparkling water” will be music to my ears!
If you can’t flatten the curve, the least you can do is grab mine 😉
Big kiss,
Billie xxxx